As far as I know, as long as there have been schoolyards with young boys and girls of different sizes, shapes, ethnicities and cultural backgrounds - there have been bullies. I always recognized a bully as someone who had an indisputable advantage (physically, economically) over another and uses it to do harm to that person. I guess even bullying couldn't hide from the claws of technological advancement. Now we have "cyberbullying" which, according to Wikipedia is "the use of the Internet and related technologies to harm other people, in a deliberate, repeated, and hostile manner." While cyberbullying removes the threat of direct physical harm to a person, it does seem to have devastating psychological affects on young people.
This past Wednesday Felicia Garcia, a teenager from Staten Island, jumped in front of an oncoming train and killed herself in front of her Tottenville High School classmates. Garcia was reportedly teased by her fellow peers about a sexual experience she had with some football players. Two days before her suicide, she posted the following tweet on her twitter account:
Just before she jumped, Sara Brager, heard Garcia say "Finally, it's here". Finally it's here; as if to say that life is so bad, that at last an escape from it all has arrived. Garcia did have a very unfortunate life, as both of her parents passed away when she was little, resulting in her being cared for by her aunt. She began to dislike her living situation, and she ran away from her aunt's house with an older man. She managed to find even less stability, as she entered the foster care system and was moved from home to home. She was probably one who could've used a break from the people that she spent a majority of her time around in school.
Bullying has always been an issue worth concern, but only recently has it gotten the attention of the national media. Now we even see ad campaigns and celebrities speak out against it. Recent incidents, including Canadian teen Amanda Todd who also committed suicide as a result of bullying, have made it seem like bullying and suicide are a new epidemic. Statistics, however, show the contrary:
- Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people, resulting in about 4,400 deaths per year. For every suicide among young people, there are at least 100 suicide attempts. Over 14 percent of high school students have considered suicide, and almost 7 percent have attempted it.
- Bully victims are between 2 to 9 times more likely to consider suicide than non-victims.
- At least half of suicides among young people are related to bullying.
- 10 to 14 year old girls may be at even higher risk for suicide.
- Nearly 30 percent of students are either bullies or victims of bullying, and 160,000 kids stay home from school every day because of fear of bullying.
While bullying and suicide have long been linked together, there does seem to be a spike in the publicity of cares like these. With Amanda Todd and Felicia Garcia, there are a couple similarities not only in the end result, but in the circumstances surrounding their stories. As a pre-teen, Amanda Todd was convinced by someone on a video chat to expose her breasts on camera. She faced bullying by that same individual who threatened to show the topless photo to all of her friends, unless Todd "gave a show". The photo wound up being released, and Todd and her family relocated due to the massive harassment she received. The individual seemed to follow her, though, creating a Facebook profile where her topless photo was the profile image. This made it hard for her to make friends anywhere she went. She did happen to meet someone that she thought liked her; a boy whom she had sex with. The boy's girlfriend then lead an all out assault on her a week later, where Todd was ganged up on and beaten; all while insults where shouted at her. She attempted suicide several times, until she was finally successful. Todd created a video and released it on Youtube; a chronicle of her life and troubles as an an anxious, highly-sexualized and depressed teen.
Garcia's downfall also seemed to stem from excessive teasing due to sexual experiences. This past Monday, a video that supposedly captured the incident of Garcia and the football players, had been shared with her schoolmates. The verbal abuse had gotten so bad because of it, the school issued a meeting between Garcia and two 17 year old boys. This explains the saddening tweet she left later that day before ending her life two days later. On a small scale, one would observe that sexuality was present in both of these cases and may have had a lot to do with how these stories played out. But there is something else here that I believe is the most important factor: social media. The access that we, as humans, have to one another now is uncanny. We no longer have cell phones "in case of emergencies" and with many individuals, you can trace every event in a person's life by monitoring their facebook account. We can now track our friends activities through GPS and Foursquare, knowing everywhere they have been and everywhere they are going. On one hand, this has become a great tool for social interaction amongst friends.
But what about people who are not your friends?
Those with ill-intentions have the capability of having just as much same connection to your life as those who mean well. One could say, "Well don't you have control over who you give access to? Why would you let someone in your life that means you harm?" To that I say, "Have you checked YOUR friend list lately?" How many times have you gotten a friend request, been unsure of where or if you know the person, and accepted it because you didn't want to be rude? Most people's social networking circles are filled with people that they would not recognize or say hello to if seen in person. In this day and age, so many of us have a desire to be liked and we seek numbers to add validity to our popularity. It's not a coincidence that Facebook incorporates a "like" button that has revolutionized how we accept and deliver information. Whether we promote a business or just socialize, many add on to their social network entourage without examining just who they are sharing information with.
Amanda Todd did not directly know the person who ended up blackmailing her, yet this person knew her name, address, and where she went to school. This should be extremely alarming to anyone who routinely presses that royal blue post button or that baby blue tweet button. How did a stranger know so much about another stranger that they were able to confidently engage in cyber-extortion? These sites recognize the business that is to be had through tracking the information to you share. If you haven't noticed, the default setting on certain sites has become to automatically to make your private information and messages public. You actually have to make a special effort to keep your cell phone number as "not visible" to everyone. These networking companies use the information that you offer (for free, mind you) and sell them to other companies, so they know how to market products to the public. Facebook has become a breeding ground for mass - market research. Market research that for years, most companies had to pay individuals for; sharing their day to day lives, opinions and purchasing trends. It is become increasingly easy to find out whatever you want to about other people. It is because of this that I really do believe social networking sites have become a dangerous place for young people. Some of the responsibility has to be put on these sites and their practices when tragedies such as Amanda Todd and Felicia Garcia occur.
I'm not saying that these sites our killing our teens. Not at all. It's just worth noting the contributions that sites like Twitter and Youtube and Facebook have in situations like these. Felicia Garcia had no outlet to make use of to express her frustrations, other than a tweet. Amanda Todd was hounded by a profile that just would not leave her alone, causing her to withdraw herself from society more and more. Both girls were victims of unwanted videos being shared of them. It's a real shame that we treat each other like this. These girls deserved better. If we are not careful about how we are using these social networking sites and who we are letting into our cyber-lives, these numbers suicide numbers in our youth will continue to increase. For the record, I am fully aware of the irony between my point of view in this post and the two buttons that follow said post at the bottom of this page. My heart goes out to those who cared for these young girls.
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